How Many Times Can Jaken Get Beat Up
by Never Ending Illusions
Summary: Rin does not like the toad. How many times do you think she could get him beat up? Made to be in chapters. Chapter 4 up!
1. Ugly GreenBrown Bird Thing

**How Many Times Can Jaken Get Beat Up?**

By

Sesshomaru's Grace

Rating: PG

Summary: Rin does not like the toad. How many times in a day can she get Jaken in trouble? Let's count.

Disclaimer: I do not own the kawaii Rin, kawaii Sesshomaru or the weird thing that always follows them around...What is its name? Um...Jaken! That's it. I do not own Jaken either. They belong to the Anime Queen Rumiko Takahashi.

A/N: This is my first one shot for Inuyasha. Hope you like it because I think its adorable! And by the way, Sesshomaru has both arms in this. All right?

Also, each time is going to be in separate chapters!

ONE-SHOT ONLY!

It was only the beginning of the dawn. The kawaii Rin was already up and about. Yawning and stretching out her small body, she stared over at the tree where her lord was last seen leaning against. But he was not there. Looking around, she became worried. Where had her lord gone off to? She felt alone but then remembered Ah-Un was with her and hopefully...she grinned wickedly...Jaken. Staring at the mountain pile of green and brown, she stood.

Ah had awakened while his brother Un slept. He poked his head up and stared at the now fully awake Rin. She smiled over at him and stepped over a few feet to pat him on the head. Leaning next to his ear she whispered.

"Don't worry, Ah. I'm just going to pick flowers in that field over there." She pointed to an open field that blossomed with the colors of the very rainbow.

Ah seemed to nod a bit before dozing off once again. Rin giggled to herself and tiptoed to the flower beds.

The toad servant opened one sleepy eye and closed it again. Then, the eye popped open again becoming bloodshot. His head shot up as well as his entire body. He frantically began his search for the little ningen Rin. She was nowhere to be found. He had awakened Ah-Un who slowly lifted their heads in anger. How dare he wake them while they were sleeping. But when they heard Jaken shouting for Rin, Ah tried to get his attention by snorting to let him know that Rin was in the patch of flowers. No such luck.

Sesshomaru walked through the woods and was heading back to camp with a deer over his shoulder. While heading back, his sensitive ears picked up on a faint and frantic voice in the distance. He kept walked and strained to hear more. It sounded just like Jaken. 'What is Jaken screaming about?' He thought. When he heard the toad shout Rin's name, Sesshomaru broke into a run, the deer being tossed from his shoulder.

Jaken finally sat down and curled into a ball. Oh, his lord was going to be angry for him failing to watch over Rin. 'Where is that brat any ways?'

Sesshomaru ran out of the woods, tokijin unsheathed.

"Jaken! Where is Rin?" He asked in a sort of panic but kept his cold expression upon his face.

Jaken gulped. "Milord..." Sesshomaru stared at him, his gaze burning deeply into the toad.

"Where. Is. Rin?" He punctuated each word.

Rin was still gracefully skipping through the flowers when she heard somebody screaming. It was a weird scream this time. Not like earlier when Jaken was calling out for her. She was getting annoyed with the toad because she hated the way he was treating her and he was no fun to be around. He always called her bad names and everything. So, she thought of getting back at the toad by playing her own little game called 'How Many Times Can Jaken Get Beat Up?' It was becoming her favorite game so far.

Turning around in mid-step, she saw something flying toward the meadow. She thought it was a bird but it looked rather ugly. It was coming closer and closer until Rin could make out its green and brown colors. Suddenly, she gasped and jumped out of the way.

Jaken landed in the meadow in front of Rin, head first into the ground.

"Oooooh..." Was all he could say.

Rin giggled to herself but looked concerned. "Jaken, are you all right?" The little one asked with false concern and a smile was plastered across her facial features.

Jaken pulled his head from the ground and saw little birdies floating around his head. Rin just giggled.

"Rin!" A deep and angered voice shouted in the distance. The little girl turned.

She gasped in delight. "Lord Sesshomaru!" Moving away from the injured toad, she ran out of the meadow and latched her grip on one of the Lord's legs.

TBC...

Well, I hope you liked this first little chapter! LOL! I love it! More to come!

BySesshomarusGrace


	2. Parting Is Such Sweet Sorrow

Chapter 2

Rin was planning her next devious plan on how to get the toad in trouble once again. The first time she thought was magnificent. He had flown through the air with the most harmful of ease. She giggled to herself and stared over Ah-Un to see Jaken holding the reigns of the two headed beast.

She had to come up with something different. For the last time, Sesshomaru kicked Jaken all across the meadow and he landed in front of Rin. She had to get Sesshomaru to do something worse to the little toad demon, but what could she possibly get her lord Sesshomaru to do the little imp that would be worse than the first time.

'It is a little harsh, but it just might work.' Rin thought to herself in her small mind. 'Maybe this time I can get Lord Sesshomaru to beat the toad to unconsciousness. That would be a sight to see.'

That night, the small pack made their camp. Sesshomaru told Jaken to watch Rin as he headed into the dark forest to get something for them to eat.

Jaken sweat-dropped as he sat down in front of the campfire, slightly averting his gaze in Rin's direction. 'That little demon child got me in trouble with Lord Sesshomaru once. She will not get me in trouble with him again.' Boy, was he wrong.

Rin stood up not wanting to sit down. She had sat down on the back of Ah-Un all day. She was a little girl who needed to walk around. Her little legs needed to be stretched otherwise she would be grumpy and possibly cramp up and moan in pain to her Lord Sesshomaru.

The retainer sat around waiting for everything to be still and quiet. Rin definitely wasn not going to be quiet so of course he would never have his peace.

The little human girl waited until Jaken's eyes were closed to make her move. Running into the wilderness on her quiet tip-toes, she disappeared as though she just vanished into the thin air.

Jaken opened his eyes only to find Rin gone from his sight. He panicked once again not knowing what to do. His lord would kill him if Rin was gone once again. He had suffered deadly that day by being kicked and flying through the air and splat down into the covered meadow of variety flowers.

Sesshomaru was back a few moments later with a wild boar for Jaken to cook up for them. Setting the boar down, he sniffed the air. Something was different. Out of place. Something like a smell that was missing from his familiar mind. 'Rin's missing once again, dammit.' The dog demon narrowed his red-used-to-be-amber eyes toward his retainer, growling an inhumane growl.

"JAKEN!"

Jaken scuttled up to his master and kneeled at his feet.

"Milord, I am sorry but young Rin has taken off once again I'm afraid."

He was about to pound Jaken in when he heard Rin's small cry of help. He skedaddled out of the camp.

A few moments later, Sesshomaru returned with Rin attached to one of his legs, her small arms wrapped tightly around it.

"Rin." He gently pushed her away and sat her down on the ground. "Why would you run away like that?"

Rin cried fake tears. "Master Jaken doesn't like me. He told me that I was a disgusting little pathetic human who should have been staying dead after being eaten by the wolves. I was so upset. Then he told me to leave and never come back and said that you didn't want me and—" She was interrupted by Jaken's yelp of surprise.

His eyes narrowed. "You ungrateful little brat! I oughta—"

"Jaken." Sesshomaru stated calmly.

"Milord?" The toad was afraid. Afraid for his life.

Sesshomaru quickly pulled out Tokijin and swung, Jaken falling apart. Tenseiga pulsed erratically and Sesshomaru pulled it out. He swiped at the creatures from the underworld and Jaken was brought back to life.

"Milord?"

"Pull yourself together, Jaken." And he did. As soon as he was back together, he sighed.

But he was never going to find peace that night. Sesshomaru swung Tokijin once again and Jaken's body split again. He brought him back with Tenseiga, telling him to pull himself together. Of course the stupid toad did.

Rin was very happy. The toad was finally getting what he deserved for all those times of treating her very badly. She saw her lord take another swipe with Tokijin and another with the Tenseiga. Throughout the night, Sesshomaru did this to teach the toad a lesson in not obeying him when he says, "Watch Rin."

TBC…

A/n Sorry this chapter took so long to get out but I couldn't think of anything to write. Plus I have school and other fanfictions that I wanted to get done and get to so I could get them out o fmy mind. Once again sorry for the late-i-tude.

Mahari


	3. Konk Konk, who's there?

How Many Times Can Jaken Get Beat Up? # 3

Rating: K+ (for a small amount of the meanies)

Summary: Rin doesn't like the toad. How many times can she get Jaken beat up?

Disclaimer: I don't own Inuyasha. They belong to Rumiko Takahashi.

-----------------------------------------------

Rin glanced over at Jaken who was trying to stoke the fire with a small stick he found near the tree closest to him. The fire was burning brightly and he continued throwing small twigs inside to help keep it lit. Rin was laying against Ah-Un and pretended to be asleep every time Jaken peered over his shoulder at her. He didn't trust her. Not one bit. After all, she kept getting him into trouble with Lord Sesshomaru. The previous two times were harsh. The first had him flying like a bird, then landing flat like roadkill. The previous situation called for a continuity of pulling himself together for Sesshomaru would swipe both Tokijin and Tensaiga erratically tearing him apart then bringing him back to life. He thinks he might still be apart due to Sesshomaru's torture with the two swords. Will he ever be able to find some type of peace?

As Jaken continued to tend to the campfire, Rin slowly stood up, hoping the toad would not her small footsteps. Ah-Un awakened alerting Jaken and he turned around to see Rin wide awake.

"Ah ha!" He stood up quickly and pointed at her. "You're trying to run off again so I will get into trouble with Lord Sesshomaru! Haha! Not this time! I caught you! You will not get me into trouble again, Rin!" He chuckled and moved himself to the other side of the fire so he could keep a close eye on her.

She huffed and sat down, arms folded across her chest. _How am I gonna get away this time while he's continuously watching me? _Then another thought struck her as she stood back up and headed toward Jaken a smile on her face. "Master Jaken?" Rin said while sitting opposite him on the fire. "I'm sorry that I kept getting you into trouble with Lord Sesshomaru. It's just that I don't have anybody else to play with and it makes me smile when you get in trouble with Lord Sesshomaru."

"Well, it hurts me, Rin! A lot!" He fold his arms inside the sleeves of his haori.

Her face turned sad and she nodded. "I'm sorry, Master Jaken. Please forgive me." And she bowed her head hoping the toad would forgive her.

Jaken looked at Rin surprised. _She's apologizing to me? This must be a trick, but I don't sense anything other than a sadness from her. She _is_ really apologizing. _"I accept your apology, Rin. No more of this funny business. Understand?"

Rin nodded and stood up. "Thank you, Master Jaken, for your forgiveness for all the the trouble I have caused you from Lord Sesshomaru."

Jaken nodded and stared at the fire. Rin stood up and skipped around. When she went around Jaken, she grabbed his two-headed staff and ran away with it. He gasped and stood up quickly running after her.

Rin was running around the camp area hoping to get Jaken to the point of big anger for her taking his staff. Finally, he seemed to be blowing steam out of his ears and she stopped throwing the staff to the ground in front of her. She smiled and put her arms behind her back.

"Na na na na na!" She gave him a raspberry.

He growled in his throat and grabbed his staff from her. She began to run again and he ran after her.

"You come back here this instant!"

She ran into the woods hoping to lose the toad.

A few moments later, Rin emerged, but the toad was still behind her. She went to Ah-Un for safety.

"You insolent girl! How dare you steal my staff and anger me!" He was so mad, he clonked her on the head with his staff and didn't realize what he did until after when she was holding her head with her hands and began to cry. _Oh no! Rin!_ "Rin! I didn't mean to!"

Rin continued crying on Ah-Un who nuzzled both his heads against the girl to help her calm down. "Eh heh heh! Master Jaken, why did you hit me? I didn't do anything wrong!" She wailed and continued crying. Although her crying was absolutely fake but with her crying, nobody could tell the difference if she was telling the truth or not.

"Rin, I-" But Jaken was interrupted.

"JAKEN!"

Jaken gulped and turned to see Sesshomaru standing behind him, eyes turning red.

"Yes, Lord Sesshomaru?" He asked meekly.

"Why is Rin crying?"

"Uh, um..."

"Well?" He was still waiting for an answer.

Jaken just gulped and bowed to Sesshomaru. "Milord, Rin stole my staff and angered me. I finally got her back and I...yelled at her."

"Is this what happened to you, Rin? That is why you are crying?"

Rin continued crying but shook her head. Ah-Un, being that they didn't like Jaken either demonstrated to Sesshomaru what happened. Ah grabbed the staff of Two Heads up with his mouth and lightly clonked Un on the head with it and set it back down on the ground. Sesshomaru nodded. "Thank you, Ah-Un." He turned a glare back to Jaken. "Jaken."

"Yes, Milord?" He asked.

Sesshomaru picked up the staff of two heads and whacked him on the head with it. He continued to until the toad was unconcious. Then he turned to Rin whose tears were subsiding.

"Rin."

"Yes?"

"Do not steal Jaken's staff again or you will receive a punishment."

"Yes, My lord." She smiled small as Sesshomaru went to sit down against a tree and closed his eyes.

Rin smiled to herself. _The toad gets it again! Yahoo!_

00000000000000000000000000000000

A/n So how'd ya'll like this one? I can you tell you right now, it's kind of hard to find different ways of getting the toad into trouble, but many ways to torture him. HAHAHAHAHA! Hope you liked this! Maybe I'll do some more later! w00t!

Ja ne

Zaru-san


	4. What Am I? A Piece of Meat?

How Many Times Can Jaken Get Beat Up Chapter 4

by Zaru

Summary: What can happen to the toad this time?

Disclaimer: I do not own Sesshomaru, Rin, Jaken or Ah-Un. They were created by Rumiko Takahashi.

A/n: Okay, I guess we're ready to figure out what can happen to the toad now. I'm kinda running out of ideas on how to torture the green thing. Help me out, ne!

How Jaken 4

It was mid-afternoon and the group was continuing traveling on their way across the Western Lands. Sesshomaru, as usual, was leading the group while Jaken walked behind him and Rin was riding on Ah-Un, guiding them with the reigns. As she sat upon the two-headed dragon, she began to think about what else she could do to get the toad into trouble. Recently, he was already kicked across a meadow, sliced in half and brought back to life a lot and Sesshomaru had beaten Jaken with the Staff of Two Heads until he lay unconscious. Now she had to figure out what else she could do to get him into trouble. It was not much fun when she couldn't think of anything else to do with him. He was always mean to her because he didn't like humans and that's one of the things she truly didn't like about him. She sighed as she couldn't think of anything cruel to do to the demon. But as usual, she always would find a way to make him pay for being mean to her just because she was human.

Soon an idea popped into her head and she laughed cruelly. _When I get Jaken into trouble, Lord Sesshomaru will do something really bad to him this time! I'm sure of it! _But it was going to take a lot of her survival skills she had learned so far to do this. Recently, she found out about the mating season of demons and heard from her lord it was the time of season for some local demons in the area. _How can I get Jaken away from Lord Sesshomaru though? _Then it hit her.

"Hey, Lord Sesshomaru?"

Sesshomaru stopped walking and turned to face Rin. "What is it, Rin?"

"I saw a hotspring nearby and wondered if I can take a bath." She said as she hopped down from Ah-Un.

He seemed to think about it for a moment. "It is dangerous in the area, Rin. Can you not wait until we reach a safer clearing?"

She sighed heavily. "I could, Lord Sesshomaru, but," she sniffed herself, "I do kind of stink right now. And I haven't bathed in days."

The dog demon turned back around. "Very well. Jaken."

Jaken bowed to his master. "Yes, Milord?"

"You will go along with Rin to keep an eye on her. Make sure no one sees her while she bathes. Especially those demons. If anyone comes close, kill them or I will kill you."

Jaken gulped. "Yes, milord!" He scuttled over to Rin. "Oh, hurry up, girl!" He moved ahead of her as she followed.

"I'll try not to take long, Lord Sesshomaru!" She called out as she waved heading away.

When they were gone, he smiled to himself. _Such innocence. But somehow, not so much within her. _

Rin giggled out loud as she ran toward the hotspring.

"Look, Master Jaken! It looks so nice and warm!"

"Hurry up! I do not want to keep Lord Sesshomaru waiting!" He growled as she took her clothes off behind a small bush and jumped into the spring.

Rin sprang through the surface and sighed contentedly. _I hope this works out like I want it to. _But she wasn't ready for it to happen yet. She swam a little, washed a little and finally got out.

"I'm almost done dressing, Master Jaken! I'll be right there!"

"Why do you human females always take so long to get bathed and dressed?"

"Because we always want to look good for our lords." She replied while humming.

Jaken just snorted. "As if you are ever able to please our lord with the way you look, human."

She narrowed her eyes. _Now's gotta be the time._ "Why are you so mean, Master Jaken!" She began to whimper.

"Why are you crying, human girl? It's the truth!"

Rin heard a slight rustle in the leaves. _Perfect timing._ "You are just cruel, Master Jaken! Always cruel!"

Suddenly, a bird demon sprang from the trees heading toward Rin. She squealed loudly alerting Jaken to her.

"No, Rin!" Jaken jumped quickly. "Feel the wrath of the Staff of Two Heads!" He jumped and fire came out of the staff toward the bird, but it did no good as the bird swooped away, dodging it. The young girl ducked away and behind Jaken knocking him out on the ground. Rin held her kimono tightly around her and ran for it toward her Lord Sesshomaru.

Sesshomaru stood, leaning against a tree waiting for Jaken and Rin to appear when he heard Rin screaming. He turned to see Rin running toward him, a bird demon sqwacking at her, claws ready to grab her. He flexed his claws and swiped at the bird.

"Poison Claw!" He ripped it in half and it fell dead to the ground, hissing with the acid from his claws. Facing Rin, he questioned her. "Rin, where is Jaken?"

Rin held her kimono tightly. "Master Jaken fell asleep while he was watching me. He didn't wake up to save me even though he did see the demon coming after me."

Sesshomaru narrowed his eyes. _That's it! I'm starting to have enough of this nonsense! Perhaps he needs a lesson to learn for the rest of his life._ "Come with me, Rin. Bring Ah-Un."

"Yes, my lord." She finished tying her obi and grabbed Ah-Un's reigns. "Come on, Ah-Un."

Jaken woke up rubbing the back of his head. _Wha-What happened? Where am I?_ He gazed around at his surroundings. _I was sitting down. Rin was getting dressed and then that bird demon--ACK!_

"RIN! Where are you, Rin? Oh no! If I come back without Rin, Lord Sesshomaru is going to kill me! What am I gonna do?!" He began to sob. _He'll kill me outright that's for sure!_ As if his mind was read, he turned around seeing Sesshomaru right there along with Rin standing next to him. "Oh, Rin! You're all right! Thank goodness! I thought that bird demon got you!"

"Jaken!"

"Mm, yes, milord?"

"I told you to watch Rin."

"I was watching her, Lord Sesshomaru, but a demon attacked and I got knocked out!"

"Hm, is that the truth, Rin?"

She shook her head. "No, Lord Sesshomaru! Master Jaken said I was ugly and I shouldn't have to be watched by him. That he wasn't my babysitter and he shouldn't have to follow those kind of orders from you!"

Sesshomaru glared down at Jaken. _That's it. He's done for now._ "Jaken..."

"Yes, my Lord?" He felt himself being lifted in the air by Sesshomaru. "My Lord, what are you doing?"

"Teaching you a lesson, you imp. You will learn to follow my orders!" He began to walk in another direction. "Follow, Rin."

"Yes, Lord Sesshomaru."

"But-But Lord Sesshomaru!" Jaken was now beyond terrified. What could his lord be doing to him now?

Sesshomaru led Rin and Ah-Un into a small clearing and dropped Jaken on the ground.

"My Lord?" Jaken asked.

Sesshomaru didn't say a word. He took the staff from him and Ah took it from his master, holding it in his mouth.

"Lord Sesshomaru, what are you doing with Master Jaken?"

Sesshomaru smirked. "Stay here, Jaken. And don't move until you are told."

"Y-Yes, my lord." He bowed to the ground and the group left him there.

As Jaken stared around, he sensed something not right and sniffed.

"Lord Sesshomaru?" He squeaked as he smelled a cloud of something filling the air. Soon, several demons came out, many drooling and others ready to pounce on Jaken since he was fresh meat. "AH! LORD SESSHOMARU! HELP ME!" He cried out. But he remembered he was told not to move until his lord said he could. The demons stalked toward him as he gulped and sweated.

Rin blinked as she heard Jaken's screams and smirked to herself.

"Lord Sesshomaru, what are you doing to Master Jaken?"

Sesshomaru listened. "He'll learn a lesson in keeping an eye on you, Rin, as well as following orders." He looked down at her while smirking. _She's a cunning one, I'll give her that. And I guess you can say I'll never get tired of teaching Jaken lessons in listening to me. Not ever._

Rin looked up at him innocently. _Ha! That'll teach you, Jaken! Until next time!_

End of Chapter 4

TBC...

A/n: So, how's this one? LOL. I think this was a pretty funny one, don't you think? It was hard coming up with something for him. And what do we find out at the end of this one? I think Sesshomaru knows Rin is lying about stuff, but he just enjoys torturing Jaken too much. That's why he doesn't say anything lol

Til later!

Ja Ne,

Zaru


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